Wednesday, March 2, 2011

The waiting game...

Here is a series of scary facts for you:
  • Matt & I do not know where we'll be living in 3 months
  • I do not know what I will be doing in 3 months
  • I have not heard back from ANY grad school
OK, those may be more scary to me than you, especially if you don't know me. But, it is putting the type-A, pre-planner extraordinaire that is me in a generally anxious mode. To be fair, Matt & I have a decent idea of the city/region where we'll be living, but we have no lease signed. 

Yesterday I heard back from my first grad school. Here is the summary of that email:
"Unfortunately, the committee has decided not to recommend your admission and I concur with this decision."
{Ouch!} Fortunately, I applied to 4 grad schools. This is one of the three that I do not care about. In the moment it was hard not to catastrophize and believe that because they rejected me so will every other school. But that's not true. Each program is different and they are looking for different things. 

As an aside, I wasn't sure I was going to post this for the world to see. I don't want pity or anything. I'm honestly at peace about the whole thing now. Why? Read on.

Matt & I were talking one morning and decided this whole experience (waiting on a job offer, grad school, etc) has been the greatest lesson of patience and trust. In my entire life, I have always known what I would be doing and where I would be living within the next 6 months. But, it really comes down to trusting God. He does have a plan and we're just not meant to know it yet. 

On that note, I'll leave you with some Bible passages that have been particularly comforting.

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.
Philippians 4:4-8

Be joyful always; pray continuously; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus... May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul, and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18; 23-24

1 comment:

  1. It's great that you're at peace with it! I was so incredibly stressed out at this same point last year when I'd been rejected by a handful of grad and law schools, midterms were going on, wedding planning was in super serious it's almost here mode and we had no idea what waited for us on the other side of our June wedding date. It's a stressful situation, I know how you feel! Hang in there like you're doing and what's meant to be will be.