Monday, October 24, 2011

A change of sorts

This is a little late in coming, but I blame grad school. 

In response to my self-declared social media fast, I had various reactions and thoughts. Things definitely changed, not so much my plan for my life, it's still unknown. Instead, my thoughts changed regarding social networking changed.

I know I don't have the most popular blog, and I'm always happy when I have 3 comments. I know more than 3 people read this blog, just most never tell me. No emails, messages, comments, etc. The purpose of this blog is to share what's going on with my life, especially with those I care about but I don't get to see as often as I would like. I like that I've gotten to know people through this blog that aren't in my 'real' world, don't get me wrong. But, I got to a point where I became fixated on getting more followers and was sad when that number dropped inexplicably. 

What's weird to think about is how I don't really know who reads this blog. I know strangers do, but that's not what bothers me. It's my friends, family, and acquaintances that read it but just don't tell me. It makes it difficult to write when I'm not sure who my audience is. Do you, the reader, like what I'm writing? Or do I sound like a blathering idiot who has no clue what she's talking about? Feedback is good. It starts a conversation. 

I'm a social person, as we all are. I thrive off of good conversations with good friends, and one of the hardest things about moving is losing all that. Matt is my best friend, but a girl still needs her girl friends. 

My parents (hi Mom and Dad!) talk about how lucky my generation is to have the internet for things like Facebook so we can keep in touch with former classmates. But sometimes I'm not so sure. It can turn into this weird stalking relationship where no real communication is taking place. Instead, I look at so-and-so's pictures, read their status updates, and I think I know what's going in their life. People do the same with me (theoretically). But that's not really knowing someone. 

I think Facebook and the like is an easy way for us to fulfill our needs to be connected with the people around us without the responsibilities of having a relationship. Yes, it does allow for you to have messages back and forth with people, but I know the majority of my time on these sites is not spent messaging people. I'm sure I'm not alone in that. It is a site I wish I could not belong to, but unfortunately some of my organizations use it to communicate so that's not really an option. 

Instead, I think my solution is to cut back severely. I'll still get on it, but just limit my time thanks to a handy little Chrome Add-On. 

As for this blog, it's going to change a little bit, too. I made an email address you can use to contact me. PLEASE no negativity/spam, etc. As I know not everyone as a google account, you can't all comment. Instead, if you have thoughts feel free to email me at littlebitofeverything.jessica[at]gmail[dot]com

It's long, I know, but copy and paste is a magical thing.  

I know social media can be a good thing, it can connect people all over the world to each other, provide a convenient way to learn, trade ideas, and get to know each other. However, I think that as the lazy human beings we are, we instead passively scroll through someone's page instead of actively typing a message.  

So, do you agree or disagree? I'm interested in your thoughts on this.


  1. I love that we can use social media to connect, but it can be hard! I know I have family members that read but they don't always tell me. Which I have just kind of accepted. It's public. If it really bothered me, I would make it private, but I do love connecting with other people!

  2. 1) I would never, ever match your self-worth with the amount of followers you have. I know you weren't, but just as a sweet reminder.

    2) Write what you love. Write about amazing pumpkin cookie recipies, or something good that happened to you today, but don't worry about what your "audience" likes! If you love it, so will they (and those who don't love it won't need in trying to keep people around for no reason!).

    3) I'm almost over Facebook. I've been thinking really deeply about deleting my account. :/

    4) Happy Monday!

  3. Hey, Jessica! I just read this post (and caught up on some older ones), and I wanted to tell you that I am really proud of you for all the seeking you are doing! I hope it is reassuring for you to know that you aren't alone, and also to be reminded that even though you're all grown up and married now, you're still super young to have everything figured out. It takes time in the real world to learn some of these things. Heck, David was telling me the other day about some of the new graduate students in his department. They are in their fifties!

    As far as social media goes, I definitely agree with you about the shallow connections... I have been considering deleting my account for a long time now, but I still feel a little bit tied to it. Especially all alone out here, sometimes it is reassuring to log in and see how happy a lot of my friends are and hear tidbits about their lives. But my relationships? They have not been improved or preserved by facebook.

    I love you. I hope we get to talk soon.

  4. I have a serious love/hate relationship with social media. An old "friend" will add me on Facebook, but when I see them at the mall won't even say hello.

    I guess the fact that some people read my blog and don't comment never really bothered me. I've always enjoyed your posts, whether or not I've had time to comment. :)

    By the way, you should add your email address to your blogger profile, so I can respond to your comments on my blog.

  5. To this never-esocial relative, I think Sar and Mary said it all. I had to "think" to even check your blog only coz it's not part of my world, and I respond by email direct to you (sometimes with a cc to my sister) BECAUSE I want a direct connection. Maybe I'm too old to get it, but blogging just doesn't seem real personal. But then, I can also live comfortably without a cellphone!! Remember I love you whether you hear it or not, Paula

  6. This was an interesting post...I try to comment on all the blogs I read...but sometimes, I just don't have time. but that doesn't mean I don't like what i'm reading or anything. As i'm wrapping up my wedding recaps...I've been spending a LOT of time thinking about where to go from here with my blog - focus on one particular topic? make it about my life? etc? but i've also really been thinking about the whole "Do i remain anonymous?" thing...and try to not have so many people from HS and college read it realizing it's me? I don't's all a fine line...but I think you've made some interesting points!